Thursday, January 3, 2013

Quotes of 2012

2012 was a very strange year.  Several good things came from it but just as many bad things came out of it.  However this isn't going to focus on either of those; this post is going to focus on some of the bizarre and hilarious.

Conversation happens everywhere and quite often you hear something so strange and so hilarious that it makes you want to double take and scratch your head.  I make it a point to collect these statements and provide them at the end of the year.    As per usual nobody will be credited with these as to protect those poor souls who uttered these words.

Sadly around July or August, I stopped writing down things so this year's list isn't quite as complete as last year's I posted on Facebook.

Without further ado... I give you


1.  I'm not hungry but I'm man enough to eat; I want my chicken tenders served with honey mustard and glory!

2. He couldn't get his footing on my butt!

3. Avada Ka-Dah-Ver, Sincerely Tom Dumbledore

4. It's OK for me to be gay, I'm a girl

5. Monkeys aren't good unless you have a good one

6. CNN today is all about what's her nuts' funeral

7. Summer Project is like marriage... but without the commitment and with lots of other people... so it's not like marriage at all.

8. Did you just call me Satan?

9. We're five people short of a mullet

10. Donnie, have you seen a picture of me? The only rapid motion I'm making is toward a buffet.

11. Oh, Josh, I said the word retard today and thought of you.

12. I smell like an attractive baby

13. Woah!  I'm a trash compactor!

14. Sometimes it just pops out of nowhere like WOAH unexpected happiness

15. If you keep pounding it and pounding it, eventually it will break.

16. We should call it "The Day Milton Set His Sphincter Aflame"

17. Everything in your house is a two dollar ho.

18. Why is Tinklebarrel in the painting?

19. On a scale of 1 to Bob Saget, I'm a 10.

20. Enjoy the bitterness of sin.

21. I have more God the Father here if anyone wants any

22. SCAR!

23. HOLY MESS they have a Dillard's!

24. I put ketchup in the salt; I do what I want!

and last but not least

25. There was a room full of Death Eaters but none of them were Jesus

Here's to a great and funny 2013!!!

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